©http://ottersandsciencenews.blogspot.ca/. Unauthorized duplication of this blog's material is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full credit and link is given to Otters and Science News Blogspot. Link to this post: http://ottersandsciencenews.blogspot.ca/2015/03/satire-us-presidents-love-and-support.html - Thank you for visiting my blog.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SATIRE by Zbiegniew Zwgstkstwig
I KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOUR COUNTRY, BIBI. JUST DON'T ARGUE WITH ME.
I was invited to an informal meeting with a couple of top White House officials, whom I will call Irving and Jamal.
"We want to dispel once and for all the notion that this administration is hostile to Israel," said Irving, as a form of introduction.
"There are allegations that the president is helping Iran develop nuclear weapons that could threaten Israel.
"On top of that," said Irving, "there has been too much misinformation characterizing the president as bullying the Israeli government and not caring enough for Israeli security."
"That's the impression many people in Israel have," I said.
"Wrong. You're totally wrong," said Jamal with great emphasis. "It's true that the president has been rather forceful at times in making certain demands for peace, but this is because he cares so deeply for the future of the state of Israel and the Israeli people."
"Is that why he sent an army of White House aides to meddle in the upcoming Israeli elections," I asked, rather sarcastically.
Irving did not even blink. "Of course," he said. "Sometimes - as the president has stated - Israelis don't know what's good for them.
"Obama knows what's best for Israel, so we are helping Israelis see the light and vote for candidates who agree with the president's vision, and who promise a swift partition of Israel along the 1967 lines and the division of Jerusalem. For peace, naturally."
"Isn't that interference in the affairs of a sovereign country," I asked.
"No. Not at all," said Irving. "Consider it an extension of American aid - of a psychological kind in this case," added Irving. "Israelis are in urgent need of White House guidance."
"I don't mean to question the president's policies," I said. "That would be a racist thing to do. But you have to admit that he hasn't been successful in managing his own country, even when he had a majority in Congress."
"America is more divided than ever along racial lines, and its southern border is for all practical purposes nonexistent. So why should Israelis even consider that president Obama's ideas will bring peace and harmony to Israeli-Arab relations and security to Israel?"
"You'll just have to trust him, Zbiegniew," said Jamal, in a tone I found rather chilling.
"Once Israel returns to the 1967 borders there will be a major change in the whole Middle East," said Irving.
"It's the Palestinian conflict that irritates Arabs and makes them start wars and insurrections just to vent their anger against Israel.
"Once there is a Palestinian state you'll see how peace returns to Iraq, Syria, Lebanon, North Africa, and so many other Muslim lands now engaged in carnage."
"Wow!" That was all I could say.
"Exactly. That's the president's vision. It's awesome, said Irving. He'll probably get a second Nobel Peace Prize for facilitating the creation of the Islamic State of Palestine. An amazing man."
"But how can shrinking Israel down to indefensible borders result in anything but the obliteration of the country," I asked.
"That's the wrong way of looking at it, interjected Irving. Size does not matter when Israel has such strong military plus nukes to defend itself."
"But Israel won't be eager to mass invade a sovereign Palestine, when Iran or Turkey may come to its defense and start a major conflagration. And a nuclear attack is out of the question," I argued.
Then I added: "There are ways of bringing a country down to its knees by a terror war of attrition, for example. I'm thinking of rockets, tunnels, massacres, shooting down passenger airplanes, that sort of thing."
"Not if the Arabs promise to live in peace with Israel. Muslims love peace and they always keep their word," said Jamal, with a straight face.
"And there is something else, added Jamal. If the worst comes to worst, the Jews of Israel will be forever remembered as we now remember Holocaust victims.
"Historians will hold a place of honor for Jews who sacrificed themselves and their country in the name of peace. There will be a commemorative day dedicated to them each year."
"That's exactly what I thought," I gasped with dismay, and staggered out of the meeting without saying another word.
Copyright Zbigniew Zwgstkstwig
Continue reading and see more cartoons and video
