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Monday, May 19, 2014

JUST SATIRE - BRITAIN'S FUTURE? WHAT THE BBC SCHEDULE COULD LOOK LIKE IN THIRTY YEARS

The following is a satire by the anti-European Union website Snouts in the Trough. 

6.00: G-Had TV  Morning prayers and a couple of suicide attacks.
8.30: Talitubbies  Talitubbies say “Eh-oh”. Dipsy and Tinky-Winky repair a Stinger missile launcher.
9.00: Shouts of Praise More prayers for the Islamic Republic of Britain and curses for the Great Satan – America
10.00: The Apprentice  Ten young Muslims complete a variety of tasks each week – one of them will be recruited by prominent Islamist leader Muqtada al-Sadr into a top position in the Mahdi Army.
11.00: Jihad’s Army  The Kandahar-on-Sea battalion repulse another attack by evil, imperialist, Zionist backed infidels.
12.00: Ready, Steady, Jihad!  Celebrities make lethal devices out of everyday objects.

12.30: Panoramadan The programme reports on Great Satan America’s attempts to prevent the followers of the true Religion of Peace taking over the world.
13.30: Xena  Modestly dressed housewife Xena stays at home and does some cooking.
14.00: Only Fools and Camels  Dhal-Boy offloads some Chinese rocket launchers to Hamas.
14.30: Green Peter  The total number of Kalashnikovs bought by the milk bottle top appeal is revealed.
15.00: Madrasah Challenge Two more Islamic colleges compete. Bambah Kaskhain asks the questions. ‘Starter for ten, no praying’.
15.30: Question Time Members of the public face questions from political and religious leaders. Those failing to answer correctly are flogged or hanged or both.
16.30: Countdown Can the American prisoners defuse the bomb in their cell before the timer runs down?
17.00: Koranation Street Deirdrie faces execution by stoning for adultery.
17.30: Middle-East Enders The entire cast is flogged and then jailed for unislamic behaviour.

18.00: Holiday The team go on pilgrimage to Mecca. Again.
18.30: Top of the Prophets Will the Koran be No.1 for the 63,728th week running?
19.00: Who wants to be a Muhajadin? Mahmoud Tarran asks the questions. Will contestants phone a mullah, go ‘inshallah’, or ask the Islamic Council?
20.00: FILM: Shariah’s Angels The three burkha-clad sleuths go undercover to expose an evil scheme to educate women
20.00 FILM (on the blood-red button) Seven Kidnapped Brides for Each of Our Brothers Filmed in Nigeria and featuring your favourite stars from Boko Haram
21.30: Big Brother Who will be taken out of the house and executed this week for adultery or apostasy?
22.00: Imam Ted  Sitcom about three imams who live on a tiny island in the Persian Gulf. This week, Imam Dhuga’il accidentally burns down the mosque, while Imam Jakh is stoned to death for drinking alcohol
22.30: Shahs in their Eyes  More hopefuls imitate famous destroyers of the infidel
23.30: They think it’s Allah over  Quiz culminating in the ‘Don’t feel the Mullah’ round

Midnight: When Imams Attack  Amusing footage shot secretly in mosques. The filmers were also secretly shot.
00:.30: The West Bank Show Arts programme looking at anti-Israel graffiti art in the Occupied Territories.
01.30: Bhuffi the Infidel Slayer More infidels put to death for being…well…infidels
02.00: A book at bedtime The Koran. Again

Source
http://www.snouts-in-the-trough.com/archives/9491

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